Friday, June 27, 2014

SHIRLEY'S SECOND YAHRTZEIT-ENGLISH


פ"נ
 שלאּובה בת משה יצחק
נפ' ח' תמוז תשע"ב

 SHIRLEY SILVERMAN 
MOTHER
DIED JUNE 27, 2012
ת' נ' צ' ב' ה'
Pay Nun means “Here is buried/Po Niftarah”
Sluvah daughter of Moshe Yitzchak
Nun Pay means “Niftarah/Died”
8th day of Tammuz 5772 = June 28 2012 (see HebCal.com)
Then the last line means “May her soul be bound up with the bounds of eternal life." 


YEAR TWO OF 'COMPLICATED' GRIEF

Thankfully I have a good therapist and a warm, sweet, compassionate Rabbi to help me through this very difficult process. The 'new normal' - living life not in relation to Shirley - part of me died right along with her I realize.  My Rabbi says I am in a different stage of grief now + my therapist. It is very difficult when you don't have anyone to talk to about the death of my mother. She isolated and refused to answer the telephone so ................apparently no one has memories of Shirley except me.

I signed up for Yoga for Trauma Sensitive People at the Trauma Center in Brookline. In 2008, I participated in a research study there for people with PTSD. I was put into the Yoga group fortunately. Over Memorial Day weekend, the New York Times had many articles on PTSD, including a lengthy article about  Dr. Bessel Van der Kolk, A Revolutionary Approach to Treating Trauma. He is the Director of The Trauma Center in Brookline.


 
 

5 comments:

carol said...

Bernice emailed + said:

It is a very difficult time - I have a slight memory of your mom, talking on the phone a few times, and spending a day with her - lunch, etc. But your memories are so vast and mixed up. I wish you a continued period of healing Carol - a meaningful tribute to a very troubled Shirley. My love

carol said...

Thank you Bernice! Thank you for understanding. I will be writing more. Her hebrew yahrtzeit is Tammuz 8 coinciding with her birthday, July 5th, the same as your grandson Jeremy's...

Ellen said...

Two years already...I think grief is difficult no matter what a person's relationship with a loved one was. Rest in peace, Aunt Shirley.

carol said...

Yes it is. I found some solace and some comfort from reading On Grief and Grieving by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross which is where I learned about 'complicated grief.'

carol said...

Bernice emailed:
I attended a seminar many years ago where Kubler-Ross was the speaker,
what an amazing woman.I also read her book.Continue your quest to understand and heal.My thoughts are with you always….