SHIRLEY

Four years ago today, June 27th, Shirley passed away. According to the jewish calendar, her yahrtzeit is July 13th. Barry came out of the woodwork after four years two weeks ago. He told me he went to the cemetery and it took him an hour to find her grave. I asked when he went and he said, "Ironically I went on Father's Day." (You can't make this stuff up) That must be the second time he was there. The first time was the day of the funeral, a sweltering 90+ degree day in July, graveside service. It was so hot the air was shimmering while we huddled under umbrellas for shade. Suddenly, just like in a Sergio Leone movie, I see Barry, held up on each side by his neighbors stumbling towards us. He was totally drunk. He had to be held up. He could not walk. What a scene. Wherever she was, dead or alive, drama ensued. I had to lean against a nearby gravestone not to just faint dead away. Under extreme stress, I told the rabbi to ignore him because this day was about Shirley. He brought the drama to the funeral.

The day of the anti-Semitic incident, June 21st, I emailed Barry about it. The response I got was:
"I am drunk." Watching Bladerunner." There has been zero communication since. It is sad. Very sad. What a waste. After two rounds of Detox, two rounds of Rehab...four years ago his doctor told me if he starts drinking again, he will die. I check the Obituaries daily.