IMMIGRATION + FAMILY SEPARATION

I read an article about the children who have been taken away from their mothers at the border, put in cages or sent to foster care. I have PTSD and it is a trigger; it puts me right back to Barry, age 10 who was taken away from his mother when he was ten years old. He never recovered from that. Shirley never recovered from that. And I have not recovered from that event. Only Julius was not affected. His life did not change. He lived in Malden and went to 'the club' regardless of his address. When I think of Barry in that situation, it is heartbreaking. He should have had therapy, support - he had neither of those things. I told Julius I would help and wanted to be actively involved in Barry's life but Julius did not want that.

I/we have first hand experience, especially Barry who was separated from his mother and went to live with his father, Julius Silverman. I read a recent article in the NYT about this issue - the mother said, my son has been returned to me after an over a month separation. "The little boy who was returned to me is not the same little boy I knew before. His behavior is different. He is a different child." I will look for that citation. It was terrible for Barry and Shirley and me.

Suffice to say with first hand experience, what happens in the first ten years of a child's life sets the tone for the rest of their lives ! You do not 'get over' the TRAUMA.

C-SPAN is covering hearings on the Migrant Family Reunification, Zero Tolerance Policy which has separated children from their parents causing permanent Trauma. Very painful to even hear. Now we are hearing from medical professionals testifying to the permanent trauma those children will suffer and characterizing it as child abuse which it is. This is a personal issue. Richard Blumental and Kamala Harris are on the Senate Judiciary Committee asking questions.

"Among the officials were leaders of the Immigration and Customs Enforcement, Health and Human Services, and Customs and Border Patrol agencies, one of whom told lawmakers he had warned the Trump administration of potential emotional and psychological effects for children affected by the policy."

Here is the citation from the New York Times:
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/07/31/us/migrant-children-separation-anxiety.html

"PHILADELPHIA — Before they were separated at the southwest border, Ana Carolina Fernandes’s 5-year-old son loved playing with the yellow, impish Minion characters from the “Despicable Me” movies. Now his favorite game is patting down and shackling “migrants” with plastic cuffs.

After being separated from his mother for 50 days, Thiago isn’t the same boy who was taken away from her by Border Patrol agents when they arrived in the United States from Brazil, Ms. Fernandes said last week."

 

NEW COMMENT FROM 'MARIN DAVID'

Imagine my surprise upon looking at the blog this morning. I was using a tablet instead of my laptop so I did a search for the Sandler Family Archives blog. The search results lead me to a December 18, 2011 post. Again, imagine my surprise upon seeing a comment from 'marindavid' who now lives in Marin, formerly of Dorchester !

Now we have somebody elses fond memories of growing up in Dorchester - I like the way he captured it - Mattapan was 'upscale' - as a child I didn't have that perspective but looking back it certainly was. The Oriental theater did indeed have stars on the ceiling and two Buddhas, one on the right wall, one on the left wall with glowing green eyes in the dark.....

Here it is:
marindavid said...

Growing up in Dorchester in the 1950's, Saturday matinees at the Morton on Blue Hill Ave were common - BUT, for an extra 5 cents (30 cents) we could go to the Oriental where the ceiling shone with moving stars and the atmosphere was really 'upscale.' Mattapan Square was considered 'uptown' in those days, as compared with the Dorchester-Roxbury end of Blue Hill Ave where the G&G, Temple Beth Hillel and the Roger Wolcott and Pauline A. Shaw schools were across the street from each other at Morton & Norfolk Streets.

March 22, 2018 at 1:52 AM 

A BIRTHDAY AND A YAHRTZEIT

Happy Birthday belated to Bernice !  July 11th.
Bernice's birthday coincides with Aunt Ruth's second yahrtzeit.

Since I heard from Barry on May 25th I've been working on getting a stone for Shirley. I've been to the monument company twice, visited a rabbi to make sure the hebrew inscription is correct and a couple of trips to the cemetery. Update: I need another trip to the cemetery to finalize the design.

It's been insanely hot here - over 90 degree days; last week, 100 degrees..... monday is supposed to be 98 degrees. It is much hotter here in the summer than it used be when I was a kid. June and July used to be such comfortable months. Shirley and I loved to go to the beach - 75 - 80 no humidity. We went to Wallaston beach or Nantasket. A lot of fun, very relaxing. It's not like that now. Much, much hotter, uncomfortable, more like Florida in the summer. I'm not liking it. It's hotter everywhere - my friend Joan called from Oakland, California - hot, hot, hot....it was not like that when I lived in Berkeley. It was actually quite chilly there in the summer and I missed my Boston summers, t shirt weather.

The one good thing going on is THE RED SOX, the best team in baseball ! It's  been a lot of fun watching them win, finding a way to win, coming from behind to win ! We beat the Yankees 15-7 Thursday night. Last night Rick Porcello pitched a gem - a complete game into the 9th inning, 4-1 win. Awesome and really fun to watch. Today we are up 3-0, bottom of the 6th. So far, Dave Dombrowski has made really good acquisitions - Steve Pearce (3 home runs in Thursday's game) and Ian Kinsler for second base. He is really good except he just went on the DL with other players who have hamstring problems.